Thursday, May 12, 2011

Quirks of the Cosmos: Cosmic Punch at the Beauty Pageant


Do you know that Venezuela has Male Beauty pageants?
The masculine contestants have talent and swimwear competitions.
They even demonstrate that they are more than a pretty face at ‘Question Time’
Today’s Quirks of the Cosmos Thursday is inspired by another story The Prude read this morning:
Rich Chinese businessmen, to show off their wealth, brought rare and expensive bottles of wine to a party.
They uncorked them, poured them all into a punch bowl, mixed them together and drank.
Today the Prude is mixing several rare and quirky stories and calling the result

Cosmic Punch at the Beauty Pageant

Picture our beefy Venezuelan male beauty contestants (swimwear competition is over so please imagine them fully covered in evening wear).
They stand nervously at the mike, trying not to lick the Vaseline off their lips as they are presented with their questions.

Contestant # 1
Q: The fences made famous by the Beatles song ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’ are being pulled down and put into storage after being a tourist attraction for almost 50 years. What is your opinion?
A: 50 years? I thought 50 years was forever.

Contestant #2
Q: Queen Elizabeth of England has become their 2nd longest reigning monarch. She overtook Mad King George. What would you say to her?
A: I would say ‘If you had just let King George win, maybe he wouldn’t have lost his temper.’

Contestant #3
Q: Norma Zimmer, Lawrence Welk’s famous Champagne Lady, died peacefully at age 87. What would you like to be famous for?
A: Golly. Champagne gives me hives. I think I’d rather be famous as ‘Beer Guy’

Contestant #4
Q: Thousands of people are flocking to Switzerland to see the Stinky Flower in full bloom, for the first time in 75 years. It smells like rotting flesh.
What is your favorite aroma?
A: That is Totally Awesome. Did you say Switzerland?  Excuse me while I call my agent to book a flight.

Contestant #5
Q: Smokey the Cat has been deemed the ‘Worlds Loudest Cat.’ What do you---
A: I know! I know! World peace!!!!!

1 comment:

Lori said...

I didn't know Norma Zimmer had died. She was a lovely person.

Contestant #5 wins, of course, with the always appropriate answer.