Monday, May 9, 2011

Never Send a Land Mine Investigator to do a Shortstop’s Job.

In the decision-making world, one can either be a Shortstop or a Land Mine Investigator (LMI).

A shortstop in a baseball game needs to make split-second decisions (throw to first? second? home? pitcher? catcher? cuss at the ump? readjust a part of my anatomy whilst the world looks on?)
Decisioners in this category assess a situation, weigh their options, come to a conclusion and act on the decision faster than you can say ‘Bucky’s Your Uncle’

Like those who cautiously tiptoe onto a field peppered with land mines designed to explode if so much as a hummingbird sneezes,
our LMID’s take into account every possible aspect and repercussion and implication of any situation. She agonizes over each step, uncertain which one will explode into a Wrong Decision. Conclusions for this group are born of umpteen scenarios, sweat and a box of tissues. Final decisions are more rare than a World Series trophy at Wrigley Field.

The Prude is firmly in the Land Mine Investigator camp of decisioning.

So why on earth she thought she could make a selection and declare a winner in the first (and no doubt last) Add a Caption: Win a Prize contest she will never know.

When she tried to take the easy way out and pull a name from a hat she was ridiculed (by a Shortstop type decision-maker) as having no backbone. Of course she doesn’t. It was blown to bits last time she beat a hasty conclusion.

What is a LMD Prude to do?
Award multiple prizes. The top 3 will receive a prize with little or no nutritional value.
Congratulations to:
1st: Celeste for the best use of puns
2nd: Brandon for short and pithy, with the intangible Mother’s Day appeal
3rd: Mark for the courage to be controversial and chance offending sparrows everywhere

Honorable mention (because you all made me smile)
-Linda for a caption befitting our volatile housing market
-Sue for being first and using multiple applications
-Joanie for 3 words or less
-Tammy R. for best ‘mother of boys’ comment
-Tammy D. for best personal-experience application
-Beth for her ‘Sue Spoiler’ caption
-Carol for best ‘insider’s knowledge’

Thank you all! Come back tomorrow to see what’s cooking for the Tuesday Stew.

1 comment:

Brandon said...

I'll take second :D