Look at these items.
|twig, mint, eggshells, baking soda, charcoal|
What do they all have in common?
The Prude will give you a hint:
it is GLOBAL VILLAGE Monday.
Awww- you didn’t need the hint, did you?
Perceptive, intelligent readers that you are, you immediately knew they all represent tooth cleaning commodities from throughout history and civilizations.
Salt and pepper have also been used (pepper?) as has burnt bread and a substance so disgusting that The Prude will not mention it.
She doesn’t want you to join her at the bathroom sink gagging at the thought every time you apply a brush to your molars etc.
Sure, pepper is all well and good, as is the baking soda The Prude used as a child when her father was on one of his ‘use-it-because-we-can’t-afford-toothpaste-right-now’ sprees.
Those of you enamored with British literature from the mid-20th century have doubtless noted their references to tooth powder tins and/or boxes.
Fast-forward to 2011 and you can find bottles of tooth cleanser lurking amidst the tubes and the tablets.
But, wonderful as your charcoal, your twig, your eggshells or your tin may be, none of them holds a candle to the lowly toothpaste tube.
Go ahead, burnt bread, can you do this?
Didn’t think so.