Photojournalism Friday

On the premise that it is easier to photograph dirt than clean it:

Could this be an exotic moonscape?

Or just hard water deposits in the dog dish

Is this an exciting discovery under the microscope?

Or maybe it is just an old rusty plate

Look at the lovely patterns in the brick!

Never mind. It's just the reflection off the spilled gunk on the refrigerator shelf

It seemed heartless to dispose of such a lovely, glittery cobweb

This is almost assuredly an endangered species of moss.

 The Prude and her husband wouldn't dream of scraping it.

Have a wonderful weekend, and keep your eyes peeled for photogenic dirt.
See you on Global Village Monday!

Quirks of the Cosmos Thursday: Top 10 Differences Between Queen Boudica of old and Future Queen Kate

 On Hist’Ry Wednesday we learned a bit about Boudica, a first century queen in England. Boudica and the Romans had a falling out. The Celtic Queen and her warriors (remember the Celts who painted their faces blue and tended to skimp in the undergarment area from ‘Braveheart’?) marauded London, eliminating tens of thousands of Romans.

Today, Quirks of the Cosmos Thursday, we examine the astounding and quirky differences between Boudica of Yore and the Future Queen Kate of England on the eve of her wedding to Prince William.

The Prude realizes that David Letterman has been doing Top 10 lists for some time now, but she is supremely confident he has never tackled this particular list.

TOP TEN DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE WARRIOR QUEEN AND THE PRINCESS BRIDE

10) ‘Will and Boudica’ doesn’t have the same ring as ‘Will and Kate’

9) Kate’s royal guard will be in full dress uniform; Boudica’s Celtic warriors were in full blue face paint

8) Boudica invaded London to get rid of the foreigners, foreigners are invading London to see the wedding

7) The Romans reported that Boudica wore multi-colored gowns, ‘Style’ magazine informs us that Kate’s gown is a mystery.

6) Kate will be chauffeured to her London nuptials, Boudicca preferred to drive her own chariot with her snow-white robust arms.

5) Boudica didn’t need to wait for her mother-in-law to step down from the throne

4) Kate is the toast of London. Boudicca toasted London.

3) Heads of State are rolling into London for the wedding, Boudica made sure the heads of statesmen would roll in London.

2) ) Elton John was only a child when Boudica was in power

AND THE NUMBER 1 DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BOUDICA AND KATE

1) England was almost bankrupt at the time of Boudica and owed money to a foreign power…

 oh wait. Maybe things haven’t changed so much after all.

See you tomorrow for Photojournalism Friday!

Queen for a Day

Welcome to Readin’, Writin’ and ‘Rithmetic Wednesdays. Today we include hist’Ry and cuRRent events.

You’ve no doubt heard there is a wedding Friday in London? Prince William (Will) is marrying Katherine (Kate) and one day Will shall be king and Kate his queen.

She’ll carry on a long tradition begun almost 2 millennium earlier with

Queen Boudiccea (Boudica).

About AD. 60, during the Roman occupation of England, Boudica was a statuesque Celtic woman with red hair flowing past her waist.

She became queen when her husband, king of a small northern province, died and willed her half his kingdom. But the Romans figured they had dibs.

They also didn’t believe in women in government.

So they ordered her to repay the huge debt her husband had incurred via lavish deficit spending. 

They beat up Boudica.

This was a mistake, since

Roman soldiers were frightened of Celtic women. They're described  as 

‘very strong, and with blue eyes; in rage her neck veins swell, she gnashes her teeth, and brandishes her snow-white robust arms. She begins to strike blows mingled with kicks, as if they were so many missles sent from the string of a catapault’*

sites.google.com

Neck muscles a-swell, a vengeful Boudica raised an army and led her troops into battle. Her red tresses flying in the wind, she drove her own chariot with her snow-white robust arms to Roman settlements like London. She sacked the city and kicked and killed Romans by the tens of thousands before her rag-tag army was crushed by superior Roman forces.

Legend says Boudica poisoned herself to avoid capture.

ALTERNATE ENDING

The Prude prefers to imagine Boudica nursed back to health by a handsome Celtic farmer. Admiring her glorious red mane and gnashing teeth, he took her as his bride. They lived happily ever after. 

He called her ‘Boo’ for short and they raised scores of spunky little redheaded children.

The Prude mused on what a wedding for Boo and her beloved would be like.

She mused on the upcoming nuptials for Will and Kate.

Like all good musing, it led her to come up with

Thursday’s Quirks of the Cosmos post:

THE TOP TEN DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE WEDDING OF WILL AND KATE AND BOO AND HER CELT.

See you then!

*Ammianus Marcellinus from "Celtic Women: Women in Celtic Society and Literature," by Peter Berresford Ellis (0802838081), p.82.

Tuesday Stew: The Prude Sees the Light and Experiences a Flash of Irritation

A shaft of streetlight just before it pokes The Prude awake

Let’s imagine The Prude Family, going home after enjoying Easter afternoon with relations. They will travel two hours through the soft evening of spring in the country. Husband Prude will drive, swig coffee, and argue with talk radio to keep awake. He keeps alert for amorous deer, raccoons etc. in the throes of Spring Passion.

These are mammals who, on catching the fragrance of an enticing female on the other side of the road, display their manliness by throwing their lusty selves in front of oncoming vehicles. (Look along any roadside in the country in the spring and you’ll see splatted hoards of virile young males of whatever species. The shy, under-muscled, bespectacled males of these species, conversely, find themselves objects of great desire by females since they are, after all, male. And alive.)

The Prude, nursing a chocolate-induced headache, dozes in the passenger seat.

So you have the scenario: a vigilant Husband driving, a headachy Prude snoozing, and dark country roads ambling gently past as the stars twinkle above.  All is calm.

Until the blazing bane of the vehicular napper ruptures her dark and inky peace.

Street Lights. 

Every tiny town, hamlet or burg is littered with them. Like clockwork, as soon as the sun drops, sadistic small town powers set them alight. Oblivious of light pollution, energy costs and a cranky Prude, each populated village beams a barrage of 400 watt light shafts in the car window, past The Prude’s fragile eyelids and into her throbbing head where they ricochet from her right-brain hemisphere to her left and back again, ad nauseum.

4 mini-towns, 6 fair-to-middlin towns, 1 metropolis and hundreds of light flashes later the Prude is home gulping down ibuprofin. But in her dreams that night she takes revenge as the Crusading Nemesis of the glaring streetlight. And she is armed with a BB gun.

Please come back tomorrow for ‘Readin, wRitin’ and ‘Rithmetic Wednesday!

Back in Business

Didn’t that little break from The Prude feel good?

Couldn’t  you merrily saunter through your day with no Prude making disapproving noises over your shoulder?

Wasn’t there great pleasure in ignoring verbs and their parses, pronouns and their antecedents, prepositions and their objects?

Weren’t you achieving resigned peace with baggy male pants?

But The Prude missed you. She is back with her customary earth-friendly fabric bag of disapprovals, adverbs, and odd photographs.

But what is that tucked in among all her standard post topics?

Is that some organization in there?

And–yes!– it looks as though she included a commitment to shorter posts!

The Prude saw the light over the last several weeks. Order, method and brevity are her new watchwords and by-laws.

Here is a peek at what you can expect here at The Prude Disapproves:

 On Global Village Monday we attempt to fix all the world’s problems by

a firm lecture and a possible time out.

The Tuesday Stew may or may not include recipes, guest bloggers, or whatever is getting the Prude’s goat)

Readin, Writin, and Rithmetic Wednesdays-  You already know the Prude loves grammar. She is expanding her horizons to include rhymin and histRy

Quirks of the Cosmos Thursdays will assess pop culture and possibly provide a chance for you to weigh in with some quirks observed. (unfortunately however, The Prude has not yet tamed her Comment Dragon)

Photojournalism Fridays will hearken to mind ‘Life’ or ‘People’ magazine, or a prudish version of ‘The National Enquirer’. Lots of pictures, few words.

Hope to see you tomorrow for the Tuesday Stew!